| <333 |
[Sep. 4th, 2008] |
The past 10 days I have been in Israel, and completely loving life. I had the best time of my life and will keep every person I've met in my heart<3
besides that, I MOVE REALLY, REALLY SOON. and I just love life.
that is all.
|
|
|
[Jul. 31st, 2008] |
I'm so lost.
I don't know what I'm doing. where I'm going. what I want to do.
I don't have a passion for anything anymore.
I've never felt so alone and lost.
I don't know what to do anymore.
|
|
|
[Jul. 30th, 2008] |
I miss and love every single one of you.
I want 2005 back.
|
|
|
[Jul. 22nd, 2008] |
I love him so much it actually hurts.
I wish I had more time with him. I cannot wait until these 2 weeks are over.
I just spent 4 amazing days in puerto rico with the most amazing people ever<3
I miss it already.
I miss dillon already.
he makes me so happy(:
I got back to FAA and now I just want to cry. I hate this place so so much. all I want is to be freeeeeee
10 daysss
|
|
|
[Jul. 8th, 2008] |
24 fucking days left.
FAA can suck my dick.
|
|
|
[Jul. 7th, 2008] |
after a well needed vacation, 4 weeks seem so long away.
I just want to move already.
my head hurts. bdhnsjmka
|
|
|
[Jun. 30th, 2008] |
I love you.
fullsale,
orlando?(:
I have a future!
|
|
|
[Jun. 26th, 2008] |
Dillon asked me to move in with him, for sure, last night.
we spoke about it and I think this might actually happen.
!!
|
|
|
[Jun. 25th, 2008] |
I think I need to have a good long cry.
LOL
|
|
| back |
[Jun. 22nd, 2008] |
For a while I had been updating in Blurty rather than LJ. I really don't know why =\
but I will be updating regularly, for I'm stuck back at FAA when I should have graduated in May. and I have 40 days left.
and my roomate is this buzzy curious 14 year old. lolololololssssh8 life.
Things will get better though. The plan is that Bianca and I will be moving to boca in the Fall with my friend Emily. Dillon is also planning to move down closer so he and I can be together. but knowing him, who the fuck knows.
Idk anything about my future anymore
|
|
| hello |
[Mar. 3rd, 2008] |
| [ |
music |
| |
the bens- Stop! |
] |
An actual update.
My life is okay.
I got into a lot of trouble with FAA and now I'm in "mini-moto", but this will be over in a week hopefully.
I love my roomates Molly and Cristina, but I miss Bianca being my roomate.
I seriously dont even know where to begin about updating my journal! so much has happend its crazy. I'm sure most of you know anyhow. I'm 18, and in a military boarding school. its AWESOME. oh well. I graduate in only a couple of months. and PHS people! I have the same grad night as you! :)
I've been reading a lot of old entries and I really have changed a lot. I read back and feel almost embarassed to have written some of the things I had in my early entries. Idk, I just reallyam a different person now.
Things with Dillon got overwhelming and he eventually went insane. litterally =/ I hope hes doing better, but I dont want to really know anymore about him. His brother and I are good friends now though. and I saw his parents this weekend at international fest, and it was a little bit awkward. His dad got braces. weird.
I really dont know where my life is really going at this point.
I want to MOVE. soon. asap.
I want to be free so badly.
but life isnt too bad I guess.
|
|
|
[Nov. 6th, 2007] |
|
life should be fun for everyone.
|
|
|
[Oct. 26th, 2007] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 crappy |
] |
everything is bi polar these days.
one day I'll be happy and love the life I'm in.
and other days, I'll feel completely miserable. Right now, I feel completely alone, and it sucks.
I've never felt so uncared for or put aside. I'm doing better in school, and my dad knocks me down everyday with how even if I got accepted in to college (which I won't, ((thanks for the support dad)) ) he wouldnt pay a penny since I already pissed away all that money from FAA.
what the fuck ever.
I've wanted so bad to find someone, either a best friend or a boyfriend, just so I can have somone to turn to when I feel like I don't matter, but that's proven to be pointless. I feel so stupid and desperate. but is it terrible to want someone to care about? to care about me?
Its been so bad that I went around in a circle of FAA boys, all of which are stupid and drug addicts. I feel miserable for letting myself get to the desperation point of reverting back to boys I hadnt even seen in 2 years. but I guess its not like I can meet anyone new. I hate that I've become so negative, and I dont want this to be some invitation for a pitty party.
I've just felt so pathetic lately, and figured its time I at least vent.
so, whatever, fuck my life.
|
|
| oh hay |
[Oct. 24th, 2007] |
|
sup LJ?
|
|
|
[Sep. 25th, 2007] |
|
my birthday is in 3 days.
and my account is NEGATIVE $40 as of right now.
neato.
|
|
|
[Sep. 15th, 2007] |
|
hay hay 13 days;DDDDDDDD
|
|
|
[Sep. 6th, 2007] |
LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.
FUCK YOU.
|
|
| DJG |
[Sep. 1st, 2007] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 uncomfortable |
] |
Dear you,
Get the fuck over yourself, grow a fucking heart, and stop being so goddamned selfish. its not cute, its not attractive, and its not going to get you more pussy.
fuck you for wasting over a year of my fucking life.
you make all these wonderful plans.
well fuck your plans. you never follow through with anything.
stop making promises, stop asking to come down to fuck me.
I'm not your fuck buddy, asshole. you're a cold hearted fucking wannabe artist. you wouldnt understand the meaning of art, it requires you to have EMOTIONS, the ablity to FEEL.
fuck you for keeping me in this bind for well over 18 months.
fuck me for still thinking about you, for still caring about you.
fuck my life, for I'll be stuck in this shithole forever.
you'll come down, and I'll put aside eveything I said. because you have that power over me.
I give up.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
omgzzz_z's journal